NOTE : For the regular advice on Week 37, I suppose there are hundreds of other websites to tell you how it
goes. This blog serves to supplement those sites, my personal favourites
being What To Expect, Baby Centre UK and Parents.
Do take note, however that I am not a professional physician, I
practise law for a living and the only thing I know about incompetent
cervix is through my own experience as a mother of 2 and a 36 week old
baking in the oven! :) The purpose of this blog then is just to simply
share the joys and heartaches, the blessings and curses, the sadness and
happiness and the disappointments and the pleasant surprises of our
journey as a mom with an incompetent cervix.
Some doctors will wait till 38 weeks to remove the stitch, but some will do it earlier, depending on the condition of your cervix and your stitch. Some will keep the KIV approach - and monitor you closely on a weekly basis to see the development of your baby (whether she is getting too big, whether level of amniotic fluid is still stable, whether placenta is starting to calsify) as well as whether the contractions you have been experiencing the past few weeks have affected the stitch. What is of utmost importance at this point is that you do not tear through your stitch.
You will probably want to ditch the stitch earliest possible, as you are done being pregnant. And you are done worrying about tearing through the stitch. You can discuss with your doctor of course, but from experience, my doctor agreed only to remove the stitch earlier than 38 weeks when the CTG scan actually picked up real contractions. Together with all the aches and pains of late pregnancy, and a whole new bundle of late pregnancy worries, we truly just want a healthy baby in our arms. And baby is, after all, already full term.
So by now you have probably ditched the stitch, or you are about to do it tomorrow, or next week. Do read Week 36 for what to expect during after your cerclage removal. People around you are already in their irritating mode of asking you the cliche questions "So when are you gonna pop?" or "Have you got a name for her yet?" stuff like that, you know. And they may think it's funny that you are now WADDLING (boink boink!!!) instead of walking. Being an IC mom 3rd time around, and observing all the pictures IC mommies posted on FB and forums, I can tell you that almost all of us gain more weight than others during our pregnancy. Yes, we have a very valid reason - it's the bedrest. It has caused a lot of weight gain (especially if you are like me, a fitness buff at normal times) and muscle loss. Just turning from left to right (and vice versa) in bed will probably leave you breathless, and that toilet trip 10 steps from your settee is probably gonna get you panting for breath.
So if you do feel like you truly want to get this over and done with as soon as possible, don't fret. You are not alone. You are not a bad mother. And well, eventhough I enjoyed my first 2 IC pregnancies, this 3rd one is taking its toll on my body. Perhaps it's just age. Perhaps the bedrest I had to endure this time around is for a longer period than the previous two, so the physical and emotional effects are taking its toll on me. If your stitch is already removed and you had been so looking forward to holding that baby in your arms but he/she is not yet making an appearance, just take this last few weeks as your opportunity to go walk the shopping complexes which you have not seen the daylight of the last 6 or so months. Go scrub that toilet with a toothbrush, and arrange and rearrange the little pink wardrobe full of little pink dresses and booties. But remember, though, if you do plan to go out, your waters may break (remember, there is no more stitch down there?) so be prepared to for that too. Bottomline is, truly enjoy these last few weeks as a pregnant lady. If you have been stuck with bedrest all these time, you probably didn't get to wear that chic maternity dress you bought when the 2 pink lines turned up on your pee stick. Well, now is the time to do that and enjoy the privileges and attention you may find yourself receiving from strangers around you at the mall and public places.
I have had strangers offering me to cut the queue at the public washroom, and seats at wherever I happen to be standing. I get chatted up by friendly shoppers. People in general would just give me a knowing smile and they don't seem to be able to help themselves from striking a conversation with me about my pregnant belly. It is a wonderful change from having been couped up at home in front of the computer/tab/smartphone/television.
Other sites will tell you to talk to your baby and all that... well, as IC mommies... and I think we owe it to our husbands and older children to pay them due attention now. Carry your 3 year old who has been missing it the last 6 months, or more. Take him to the park, go on that swing with your little girl, do all those things which you haven't been doing the last 6 months with your children, as you know within weeks (or even days) from now, you will be back to being unable to do all those things with them. As for the dear supportive husband, time for some tender loving care. If you are up to it, and if your doctor gives you the green light, perhaps it's time to resume some intimacy. :)
At the same time, always remember that late pregnancies come with its own worries and complications so even though we are totally out of our 'danger zone' (sometimes we IC mommies forget that there is more to a pregnancy than the worry of a preterm baby), it is prudent to still watch our health. Again, if our doctor gives us the green light, maybe time to resume some physical activities like walking, swimming and some stretching. Continue to eat healthily and wait for the arrival of the little bundle of joy.
NOTE : For the regular advice on Week 8, I suppose there are hundreds of other websites to tell you how it
goes. This blog serves to supplement those sites, my personal favourites
being What To Expect, Baby Centre UK and Parents.
Do take note, however that I am not a professional physician, I
practise law for a living and the only thing I know about incompetent
cervix is through my own experience as a mother of 2 and a 16 week old
baking in the oven! :) The purpose of this blog then is just to simply
share the joys and heartaches, the blessings and curses, the sadness and
happiness and the disappointments and the pleasant surprises of our
journey as a mom with an incompetent cervix.
If you are seeing your baby for the first time on the ultrasound, I can feel your excitement! You may even be able to hear his/her heartbeat, and you might be so tempted to announce to the world now that it is sooooo real!!!
But if already know you have the condition of an incompetent cervix and this is another 'IC baby' (as we IC moms fondly refer to our little babies), you may start having mixed feelings. Along with other 1st trimester pregnancy worries, you know that while others look forward to Week 14 as it marks the end of the 1st trimester, that will be the time when we will have to undergo the cerclage procedure. Some of us may already have some changes to our cervix, or if you are like me, you have a short cervix to begin with. You may not know of your condition yet, but some countries are already making it compulsory for cervical length to be checked at 16 weeks (do refer to Week 7 on England NHS's petition). I have also shared some of the worries (financially, psychologically and physically) in Week 7.
Some of us do get some bleeding/spotting at this point. I was diagnosed with subchrionic hematoma
which is supposedly common, but how many pregnant women like the idea of bleeding during her pregnancy? Blood is never a good sign, and seeing a dark patch around the sac on the ultrasound isn't exactly reassuring. The happy ending says the blood clot will dissolve on its own, the unhappy ending says you end up in a miscarriage. Either ways, it is especially not a welcomed diagnosis for an IC mom, simply because this should be the last few weeks of normal activity, perhaps even a few more gym sessions before the dreaded bedrest (modified, strict or otherwise), but with a subchrionic hematoma, again bedrest is prescribed. So now what... instead of 6 months of restricted activity, it has become 8???
But well... if it is for the good of having that little bundle of joy in your arms in the end... WHY NOT? If I have to do this over and over again, I would. But at this point, perhaps the question of whether you would stop having babies may pop up with hubby (ignore the rest, remember?). For me, this is my 3rd IC baby. and my OBGYN noted during my cerclage procedure 2 weeks ago that there were scar tissues from my previous cerclages, and he had to stitch around and away from those scar tissues. It will not get easier or less risky if I do decide to have more babies. He did mention I may have issues with dilation when labour comes (cervical dystocia). And of course, other factors like, will your career be once again stagnanted, how about finances? If you already have 2 or 3 children, you will need to plan for their future as well. Bedrest may affect them too, as most of them may still be a toddler, or a preschooler, and they need lots of cuddles and attention and outings. Which, of course, is not possible with bedrest.
Since your pregnancy is now very real (there are statistics that show if you hear and see the heartbeat at 8 weeks, the chances of a continuing pregnancy increases to 98% as compared to just a couple of weeks ago when it was slightly above 60%), this is a good week to start making some solid plans for what is to come. Start with the short term ones, like who will help out with household chores during the weeks (or months) of bedrest after the cerclage placement, who will chauffeur the older kids around to babysitters, playschools and piano lessons, who will prepare your meals, and what will you do to occupy yourself. Do you have to inform your employer now? Should you? It is best to be honest and open, tell your boss the possibilities, from the best to worst case scenario, and what to expect. As for yourself, Be prepared for the best... or worst. You may be asked to leave, or you may be granted paid leave. But always remember at the end of all this... what can be worth more than that Little Rainbow you will hold against your breasts?
