WEEK 18: Week by Week Incompetent Cervix Pregnancy Guide - SUPPORT GROUP

NOTE : For the regular advice on Week 18, I suppose there are hundreds of other websites to tell you how it goes. This blog serves to supplement those sites, my personal favourites being What To Expect, Baby Centre UK and Parents. Do take note, however that I am not a professional physician, I practise law for a living and the only thing I know about incompetent cervix is through my own experience as a mother of 2 and a 20 week old baking in the oven! :)  The purpose of this blog then is just to simply share the joys and heartaches, the blessings and curses, the sadness and happiness and the disappointments and the pleasant surprises of our journey as a mom with an incompetent cervix.

Is your bump showing? Have you finally announced to the whole world about your pregnancy? Are the little kicks getting stronger by the day? Are strangers coming up to you and (sometimes unwelcomedly) touch your bump with endearing comments? Do you know the gender of the baby yet? What are you going to name him/her???

While these are the common questions most pregnant women concern themselves with, we mommies with incompetent cervix (IC mommies, we call ourselves) worry about other things.  How is the stitch holding up? What is that watery discharge? What is considered excessive discharge? Why is the baby kicking so low in my vagina? Is it normal? Why isn't my obgyn putting me on any progesterone like most of the others in that forum I'm in? Can I cope with another loss if anything happens to this baby? How not to go crazy with this bedrest which is going on and on? (Read Week 17 here)

There is this facebook support group which helped me through my first 2 IC pregnancies and helping me tremendously through my current one.  The Incompetent Cervix Awareness Group is non judgmental, helpful, supportive and because they consist of women from all over the world with various timelines, be assured to get 24-hour advice and assurances you need!  They are real life moms with real life incompetent cervix issues, people who had lost their babies and survived emotionally.  People who had miracle stories to tell during the times you need them most, and this is one group you don't have to be shy about asking questions like, "How do I cope not having sex with hubby for 6 months?" or "I had an intense orgasm last night with the most amazing dream. Will it affect my cerclage?"   

At Week 18, we are getting nearer to viability date. On the flip side, this is also a 'danger zone', as our baby is getting bigger and heavier, thus putting more pressure on our cervix.  We may worry about cervical length at this point, or funnelling, and some of us may even wonder the differences.  But trust in the cerclage.  That is what it is for in the first place.  Funnelling usually begins at the internal orifice of the cervix, which, if it reaches 100%, may cause dilation of the cervix and cause preterm labour.  This is usually caused by pressure on the cervix, mostly by the weight of the pregnancy itself.  Cervical length, on the other hand, is where the cervix (which, is 4 cm for a normal pregnancy) gets thinner and shorter (this process is called effacement) Both funnelling and shortening of the cervix should only happen when labour is near, but we are diagnosed with an incompetent cervix in the first place because all these are happening way before we are even in the 3rd trimester.  While there is really no need to know all these technical terms, there is a good reason why most of us are put on bedrest.  It is still a controversial issue whether bedrest helps, but from what I experienced through 3 pregnancies, and from reading comments and posts from others in the same boat, it appears to help VERY MUCH.

While all these may be worrying, do try to keep positive, put your feet up (literally) and try to enjoy the pregnancy.  It is not easy, of course, and you may feel like knocking the next person who says "Take it easy" on the head, but do allow yourself some days to just smile and enjoy the little movements in your tummy. Yes, that's your baby.